5 Tips to make Special Memories on Vacation with your Kids

We really do not go on vacations with young children to relax.  We go to build MEMORIES.  With that goal in mind, here are my favorite 5 tips to create those special moments that will last long after the vacation is over.

#1--Plan a little special time with each child.  We all want to feel special and be the center of attention, even if it is only for a few minutes.  While using the baby swap passes at Disneyland, I quickly realized my older children were all vying for the extra ride with Mom (or Dad).  So they had to take turns carefully thinking through which ride they most wanted.   Having my 7-year-old drag me onto Tower of Terror was priceless.   On a cross country trip, I spent time with one child each evening.  One got extra alone time with me at the motel pool.   Another wanted an ice cream from the fast food restaurant adjacent to our motel.  Camping is especially rewarding because their is plentiful time to spend with each child--hiking, playing a game, swinging in the hammock under the stars. Amid all the chaos, be sure to spend a few magical one-on-one time.

#2--Take pictures and actually print them out.  With digital cameras we can now inexpensively takes tons of pictures.  Children love cameras, so be sure to let them take a few as well (it will surprise you what they want to photograph).  When vacation is over, be sure to print a few pictures out.  Perhaps your child would like to make a small scrapbook or hang a collage on his wall.  These make the memories last.  Most of our children have a Chuck-E-Cheese picture of themselves with a relative hanging by their beds (their choice).  We also hang a picture of each child in our kitchen from a recent vacation.  They love looking on the computer at pictures of themselves and then choosing one that captures their special moment.

#3--Buying the right souvenir.  This turns a memory into a physical object.  One of my sons has an entire stuffed animal collection and he can proudly tell you where each one was acquired--the New England Aquarium, the Amana Colonies gift shop, the Grand Canyon, Mt. Rushmore, etc.  My daughter has charms from various locations.  My other son a stretch penny collection (notice that most of these are inexpensive).   As a child I collected postcards because they were cheaper and in focus compared to a film camera's pictures.  I then wrote a memory on the back, often misspelled.  Probably the best quarters I ever spent.  As for amusement parks, we usually let the kids play a no-lose midway game. One time my then two-year-old won a grand prize that became the focal point of the toy room for three years and is still a family favorite story.

#4--Do something new.  The highlight of our Yellowstone trip for one of our children was eating at a tempanyaki restaurant.  Meanwhile my other son thought Old Faithful was more extraordinary than Niagara Falls.  Often I am surprised at what is a favorite, so I intentionally try to offer my kids a wide variety of experiences.  The beach on a very cold day was amazing for my then three-year-old who had never seen the ocean and loved the unending "sandbox"; how about camping, a museum, or historic site (their eyes were popping at Mt. Rushmore and the Grand Canyon).

#5--Break the rules.  Everyone likes to let their hair down and children love it when mom lets them break the rules.  Perhaps it is having ice cream for lunch or spending an hour at the motel pool past bedtime (think of it as good exercise to compensate for that ice cream lunch).  One of my friends always has a crazy hair day on vacation or a mismatched clothing day (especially on a car trip day).  Just be smart about which rules to keep and which rules to break.

As you can see from my list, making special memories are often NOT the expensive part of vacation but are the most rewarding.  So take some time to create memories that will last long after the vacation is over.

Christmas Magic at Disneyland--5 Holiday Extras

There really is no wrong time to go to Disneyland, but there are some better times to go. Any time when lines are low and crowds are small is a good time.  Mild weather compared to July heat is another good time.  How about some added holiday magic? Try mid-October when Disney villains come to life during the Halloween season complete with stunning Fall decor.  Combining all three--short lines, mild weather, and extreme holiday magic--are possible in early December, when Christmas magic adds a new dimension to the already impressive Disney landscape.

Because of the number of guests during Thanksgiving week and the last two weeks of December (Christmas to New Years in particular), Disney takes the holiday season to new heights in their park.  They have very few rides closed for refurbishment (sometimes only one or none) and an impressive number of shows even on the slower early December weeks.  So what is different at Disneyland during the holidays?

#1--Its a Small World--The outside is strung with thousands of lights while winter scenes are projected onto the outside building walls during certain times.  The inside has a complete renovation as native holiday decorations are added to each scene and primarily "Jingle Bells" is sung repeatedly during the ride.  The outside is stunning after dark and is a must see.  (Also the area outside this ride is the best place to catch the Christmas Parade).

#2--Haunted Mansion becomes the Nightmare Before Christmas--for lovers of the movie, this ride will not disappoint.  Characters from the movie also frequent New Orleans Square if you want a rare Jack Skellington autograph or photo.  For those not as enthusiastic about the movie, this is still an amazing experience--a Haunted Mansion with spooky holiday decor--monster wreaths, snakes popping out of presents, holiday jack-o-lanterns piled into Christmas tree shapes.  Truly an eye-popping one-of-a-kind haunted house.

#3--The Christmas Parade--Disney is known for their parades and the Christmas one adds to the magic--in addition to the numerous characters and floating movie scenes are several holiday exclusives including toy soldiers, dancing snowflakes, a toy factory complete with wrapping machine, and Santa in his sleigh; (two great viewing areas are by Its a Small World or the steps of the Main Street Railroad).  Also do not miss the nightly firework show (be aware that Fantasyland is closed for several hours during both parade and firework shows).  As a finale, SNOW falls onto Main Street.

#4--Decor, Disney Style--Main street begins with a gigantic Christmas tree (approximately 60 feet tall) fully decorated are the shops and arches.  Catch Mickey and other characters wearing their Christmas sweaters or grab some Christmas mouse ears for yourself.  Impossible to miss is Sleeping Beauty's Castle transformed with snow capped turrets and strands of lights.

#5--Santa--What would be Christmas without Santa as well as some live reindeer at Big Thunder Ranch's petting zoo.  By going early in December, you may also find a few unique presents--Mickey earrings, Disney's version of Candyland, the entire Star Wars store, etc.

For a truly memorable trip, Disneyland during the holiday season is unforgettable.  Perhaps you should add some pixie dust to your next Christmas.

12 Sanity Saving Ideas When Traveling with In-Laws

Both my husband and I come from large families and we have been fortunate enough to vacation repeatedly with our respective in-laws.  Our children consider some of these trips to be their most magical because they had cousins to play with, doting grandparents, and loving aunts and uncles.  Who doesn't want to have a sister-in-law to laugh with while watching toddlers at the beach, to stay up late playing cards, or split the cost of a condo rental?  What about bonding with your niece over an ice cream, listening to Grandpa tell a story, or swapping children at the pool.  But once in awhile, even the most loving families can challenge your sanity--a poor choice of words, a fight between two cousins, not enough sleep, sibling rivalry (and I am not talking about the kids).  Here are 10 tips to help you next time you have a long weekend planned with the in-laws:

1--Repeat the phrase "inner peace."  Repeat the phrase "inner peace."  Take a breath.  Strike a yoga pose.  Absolutely try not to lose your temper.   Remember your happy place and go there in your mind (my daughter pictures herself petting our cat).  Count to 10.

2--Exercise.  This is especially helpful if you are angry.  Go for a run, swim a few laps, lift some weights, do pilates.  After 30 minutes sweating to your favorite music, you will feel like a different person.

3--Pack Emergency Chocolate.  My friend prefers Dove because the wrapper also have a positive message that lifts her mood.  I prefer peanut butter m&ms for a little emergency and fudge for larger ones. You may also want to pack some emergency foods for your kids--I consider a few dum-dum suckers essential for traveling with my three-year-old.

4--Nod and Smile (a lot).   Seriously, be the bigger person.  Try not to take a comment the wrong way or too personally (even if it was meant that way).  Instead, think of this as a learning experience.  Instead of a comment on your parenting, think of it as a tip on something to try in the future.  Give the other person the benefit of the doubt (they are likely under a lot of stress as well).  Be kind and patient with each other--after all you are family.

5--Repeat "I am a good parent; I am a good person."  When your kids are misbehaving and you seem to be unable to please a critical in-law, you may get your ego bruised and feel like a failure.  Then you become unhappy and defensive.  Reminding yourself that we all have bad moments and bad days (even on vacation) can give you some perspective.  Trust yourself, think about the "suggestions" from your family members, and remember, you are a good person.

6--Watch "Everybody Loves Raymond" episodes.  Laughter is the best medicine.

7--Keep your sense of humor.  Take events in stride.  Things will go wrong.  Plans will change.  Staying up late to play those family games will cost you the next day.  Kids get sick.  Laugh when you want to cry or shout and lighten everyone's mood.  You will teach your children a profound lesson and have good memories instead of regrets.

8--Bring an escape hobby.  Perhaps it is a good book or an app (mine is Tetris).  Maybe you need a craft, write a blog, or be a shutter bug.  Go shopping, collect seashells, text your best friend.  The list is endless.

9--Two Words--Passive Aggressive

10--Keep expectations low (especially for your kids).  With extended families, plans often change quickly or misunderstanding over schedules can jeopardize your most anticipated event.  With low expectations, a sick baby, a cancelled event, an attraction you can't participate in, too much time or too little time with extended family is not a problem.  You simply roll with the punches.  Try not to spend too much money on these type of vacations so your expectations can remain low.

11--Decide on a reward for when the vacation is.  Perhaps you deserve a manicure, a facial, or a new shirt.  Plan a lunch with your friends a few days after you get back (the ones that will give you tons of compliments).  Week long vacations may entitle you to a new pair of shoes or a massage.

12--Gratitude.  A little gratitude can change your perception.  Write a thank-you and mention a special moment that happened; bring a small goodwill gift for the other families and distribute them during an opportune moment.

Extended family vacations can be some of the happiest memories in your and your children's lives.  But remember a few tips if you find yourself losing your mind during these memorable vacations.

Disclaimer:  This list is meant to be generic and should not be considered a list based exclusively on my or my husband's in-laws.

5 Favorite Dates for Valentine's Day

With 5 kids, Valentine's Day has become a major holiday at our house.  Between school parties, candy and flowers, and a romantic evening between the adults, Valentine's is one of the most memorable days of the year.  Here are some of my favorite Valentine locations:

#5 A Train Ride--Its the perfect do-nothing-but-enjoy-each-other's-company date with plenty of romantic charm.  Look out the window at the passing scenery and star gaze together.  Snuggle and dream to the lull of the swaying train.  Eat a few snacks, but mostly enjoy the ride.  We did this for our first Valentine's and I still have the stuffed animal my husband won at the station's crane game.

#4  The Date before the Date--Getting my hair or nails done on Valentine's makes me feel happy, relaxed, and very feminine for whatever we have planned for the evening. Even better is going to the spa together and indulging in a couple's massage or a soak in the hot tub.  I also like shopping for the right gift and love when my husband unwraps it.  Meanwhile, he enjoys seeing the look on my face when he gives me chocolates and flowers.  Especially for a night in, you might want to enjoy the other parts of the day.

#3  A Special Restaurant--With little ones, we have not always been able to have a large or long evening.  A special restaurant (sometimes a few days before or after February 14) has still made the occasion memorable.  We make sure to go someone unusual and festive--fondue, Brazilian churrasco, teppanyaki, or a city landmark, just to name a few. One year we went to Richmond, Virginia's landmark, www.thetobaccocompany.com--amazing and very different from your ordinary steakhouse.

#2  Sleigh Ride--If you live near one, it really is spectacular.  Bundled next to the one I love, my absolute favorite ride was up a ski slope to a restaurant--an impressive feat for the horses and a world class view.  

#1  Themed Hotel--These hotels cater to couples for a memorable night with each room decorated with a unique style.  From the jungle to a palace to a Phantom of the Opera room, you can indulge in a night of fantasy.  One of the best is www.anniversaryinn.com. 

My other advice is to take turns planning Valentine's Day and try to do something different than the year before (though feel free to repeat past favorites).  We often have a special dinner at home on February 14, and celebrate Valentine's Day the weekend before or after when the pressures of school and work do not affect our plans as much.  So what will you do this year?

5 Things You Don't Want to Miss at Disneyland (and none of them are rides)

When people mention Disneyland, everyone begins naming their favorite rides--Pirates, Splash Mountain, Indiana Jones.  Dumbo has become so popular that entire guide books are based around it.  In fact, most guide books are based exclusively around the rides--how to beat the lines, effectively using fastpass, sequence of the rides, etc.

Now don't get me wrong.  Rides are important, very important.  But some of our favorite parts of Disneyland were not rides at all.  If you are planning a trip to the happiest place on Earth, you will not want to miss these 5 non-ride attractions.

#5--Jedi Training (or Fantasy Faire)  Our boys still brag about fighting Darth Vader and Darth Maul to all their friends.  Their training certificates proudly hang on their bedroom wall.  We have even caught them practicing their lightsaber moves.  Friends have told me the princess equivalent is just as magical for little girls.  Be sure to skip a few rides and participate in the show--when else are you going to be trained by a Jedi Master and defeat the world's greatest villain.  

#4--Redwood Creek Challenge Trail (Disney California Adventure)  After standing in lines and going on rides, children welcome a break at a playground and this is far more than a playground.  Older children can complete a set of challenges including a zipline, rock wall climb, rope net climbs, and more with a prize at the end for completing all the challenges.  Younger guests can enjoy exploring and going on the slides.  Our three-year-old kept asking when he could stop going on rides and go back to the slides.  

#3--Fantasmic--Disneyland's nighttime show is all the magic of Disney with modern special effects.  Several scenes from Disney classics are depicted on giant floats with music, fireworks, and animatronics bringing them to life.  Watch Pan and Hook fly through the rigging as they battle on a life-size pirate ship; see the lake become a fountain show as pink elephants dance across a screen of water; gasp as a gigantic snake floats along the water's surface and twists among the Jungle Book characters; delight in the firework finale.  The show is almost 30 minutes long and rivals a Broadway play.

#2--Meeting Mickey--What Disney vacation would be complete without getting a picture and a hug from the big mouse.  Many little children refuse to go on a ride until they have seen their beloved Mickey come to life.  Our three-year-old preferred seeing Mickey in his house.  He was delighted to explore every room of "Mickey's house" and touch all of "Mickey's things."  Then when he got to give Mickey at a hug at the end, it was amazing.   

#1--Character Dining--This was one of our favorite parts of the trip and well worth the extra money.  Because of our schedule, we chose to eat dinner at Goofy's Kitchen.  We were there for almost 3 hours and saw 7 characters.  Our seven-year-old came to life.  He bought an autograph book (I highly recommend this) and then drew a picture of each character after they signed.  He also plans on adding pictures we took of him with each character.  The actors were amazing and very friendly.  Minnie started a dance party and our seven-year-old proudly showed off his break dancing moves.  The buffet dinner was good with several choices for children like pb&j pizza as well as adult food like fresh salmon.  Highly memorable, relaxing, indoors, and fun.

So when you plan your schedule, make sure you save plenty of room for no-riding times and take advantage of the shows, characters, and experiences that Disneyland offers.  

Top 10 Rides of Disneyland 2011

Disneyland (and Disney California Adventure) cannot be experienced in a single day.  The industry standard is at least 3 days, 3 long days.  Between rides, shows, parades, and shopping, it is hard to know where to begin and what to skip when time starts running short.   Choosing a top 10 list was almost impossible.  After three fun-filled but long days at Disneyland and Disney California Adventures, I had each member of our family name their favorite two rides (with no repeats).  Here is our list of the best of the best:

The Three-Year-Old:  Mickey's Fun Wheel (the giant Ferris Wheel in DCA)
                                    Peter Pan's Flight

The Seven-Year-Old:  Splash Mountain
                                    Space Mountain

The Nine-Year-Old:  Star Tours
                                  Indiana Jones Adventure

The Eleven-Year-Old: California Screamin'
                                     Tower of Terror

Dad's Pick:  Pirates of the Caribbean
                    Its a Small World

Mom's Pick: Toy Story Mania
                     The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (but I could be talked into changing to Big Thunder Railroad depending on which kids are with me)     

And these were only our favorite rides.  Some of our favorite attractions included--Jedi Training, Redwood Creek Challenge Trail, World of Color, Fantasmic, Its Tough to be a Bug movie, and of course, meeting Mickey in his house (just to name a few).  Frankly, it would be difficult to do all 10 rides, a couple of 4D movies, a couple of character meets, a break at a playground, the parade, and the evening show (either fireworks or Fantasmics) in a single day, especially if you plan on shopping, eating, and taking little ones to the bathroom.

The big surprise was that 4 of the 10 rides on our list were for rides in DCA.  Certainly something to keep in mind when planning future vacations.  I assume when Cars land opens, my almost 4-year-old will not even want to go to Disneyland but insist he spend all his time in DCA.

So what is your favorite ride?  Which ones will you pick and which ones will you skip?  Time will run short (even in the slower season), so have a plan that includes a few favorites and don't worry when you have to skip some of the attractions.

3 Common Sense Tips for Holiday Travel

With many of us hitting the road and the skies during the next week, here are a few common sense tips to make traveling a little easier.

Tip #1--Check the Weather

This should be obvious, but many of us get so locked into our plans we forget to take the weather into consideration.  One memorable year, an uncle of mine insisted on leaving as scheduled despite a severe storm.  The consequence--he was stranded on a shutdown 1-80 in Wyoming.  He ultimately made it home a day late--same as if he had waited until the storm was over before leaving.  If flying, make sure to check before you leave for the airport and keep in mind that layovers can be problematic because of weather delays.

Tip #2--Be Prepared

Because of weather, traffic, or other delays, you need to be prepared for extra hours on the road (or in the plane).  Nothing is more miserable that running out of diapers while hours from landing or wading through slow snowy traffic with hungry little ones.  One Christmas, our direct flight was re-routed through a midwest city adding a layover to our trip.  We were lucky it only cost us a few hours and nothing more serious (especially since we were flying with a toddler).

Tip #3--Keep Your Sense of Humor

I have posted this tip before, but it is worth repeating (especially for myself).  As a big planner, schedule maker, type A personality, I often have to tell myself that someday it will be funny.  Someday, it will make a good story.  Find your inner peace.  From delays, to breakdowns (car or children), to the item you forgot to pack, a sense of humor can help you avoid a lot of problems while traveling this season.

Happy Holidays and Happy Travels